The men who are with the Kardashian women have a mind of their own Yes, Timothée Chalamet, Jacob Elordi and Lewis Hamilton have each chosen, on their own, who to be with

After being spotted at Coachella, People confirmed that Jacob Elordi and Kendall Jenner are dating. Meanwhile, Timothée Chalamet and Kylie Jenner have been together for years now, appearing hand in hand in public, and it’s even said that he is a very attentive and involved stepfather to her children, Stormi and Aire Webster. Meanwhile, at the same California festival so beloved by content creators and socialites, Kim Kardashian and Lewis Hamilton were seen speeding through the desert together, looking more and more like a couple. In her photos, glimpses of his tattoos appear, faceless hands included. In short, we’re witnessing a full-on soft launch.

Are Jacob Elordi and Kendall Jenner dating? Social media isn’t happy

Social media doesn’t like any of this. From the outside, people don’t understand why men they admire so much (two internet boyfriends and an idol for Formula 1 fans, appreciated for his style, his political stances, and his love for animals — he follows a vegan diet) would be with women they perceive as superficial, vapid, even harmful, especially when they are seen as “setting trends” around body standards, cosmetic procedures, weight-loss practices, and a generally excessive and out-of-touch lifestyle. They have been accused of cultural appropriation on multiple occasions over the years and, during the festival days, TMZ reported that Kylie Jenner was sued by a former housekeeper for alleged discrimination based on religion and national origin.

Online misogyny: why men are infantilized in relationships

There may be valid reasons to find them unlikeable, but in this case we’re talking about adult men. Fully aware, independent individuals who have not been forced into anything, who have careers and agency, who were not tricked by evil witches around a cauldron on the night of the Spring Equinox, but who choose to share their lives (and inevitably their reputation and public image) with these equally adult and conscious women. Whether the rumors linking Kendall Jenner and Jacob Elordi are true or not is beside the point. The point is the tendency to infantilize men and place all the “blame” on the woman, in what is clearly a form of misogyny, one that doesn’t stop being misogyny just because it’s directed at women we don’t like. It has happened (and still happens) with Meghan Markle and Prince Harry as well.

When celebrity relationships become our problem

Treating men like puppets in the clutches of “harpies” only serves to strip them of responsibility, while reviving outdated, almost biblical narratives about the women they are with. Eve convincing Adam to eat the forbidden fruit, does that ring a bell? And then there’s the obvious parasocial aspect of it all. If a celebrity we have a crush on is photographed with someone we dislike (please notice how absurd that sounds), it cannot be a real problem in our lives. We only know these people through countless screens, literal and metaphorical. They are not our friends, not even acquaintances. We have no influence over their lives, and they shouldn’t have any over ours (beyond casual conversations about their unlikely romances). As fans, we can choose to stop following and supporting someone for any reason, and we have every right to do so. But our position remains, ultimately, that of fans. And if that boundary isn’t always clear, that’s on us.